Dinner at a Chinese restaurant
on Christmas day
while my baby was recuperating
from existing across the street
lung inflating
hooked to machines
under blue light
and I blinked my eye
and he’s walking away into life
while I struggle
to grasp all these memories wriggling in my arms
trying to hold onto every last
moment
never able to appreciate them
enough
to hold on
to stay forever in the moments
but endlessly proud of the person forging into this world